Golfonomics

I don’t know what is going on lately but I have been asked too many times over the last two weeks if I golf. What exactly does that mean? I can hit a ball with a golf club, hell I even own a set of clubs. So I guess the answer is “yes.” Uh-oh, does that mean they now think I am PGA tour ready?!? They have obviously never seen me hit said golf ball. I mean, I usually keep the ball in the fairway. Just not the fairway of the hole I’m playing.

Best shot ever. The ball was 150 yards out. Straight shot to the green (I was actually in the right fairway!). I pulled my club out of the bag. Couldn’t tell you what club, but I’m, pretty sure it had a number on it. Lined myself up and took a swing. The ball rolled to rest 3 feet from the pin. Can you believe it? Now, if I was playing on the hole where the ball landed, it would have been an awesome shot.

Now, some people watch me golf and I am sure they are thinking “Man, he sucks. Why does he even bother? He’s just throwing money away.” Not the way I see it. In fact, I am getting a better deal than they are. Sure, everyone pays the same rate for 18 holes, but let’s look at it from a per-swing rate. If you break it down that way, I am sure they are paying a hell of a lot more than I am. Who’s the sucker now?

Oh, and in case you are wondering, I apply the same rate theory to just about everything. Take bowling for example, why would I want to throw a strike? I just shorted myself one throw and raised the cost of every other ball I throw. That doesn’t sound like good economics to me. Think about it the next time you go to the store and see the “6 for $5” sale. Are you going to tell them that you will just take 4 for $5? Ha! I didn’t think so.